When you have a child or teen who is experiencing depression, anxiety, substance use or any other condition impacting their mental health, it’s often hard to find the time to take care of your own needs. But it’s extremely important that you don’t let guilt or shame stop you from focusing on your physical and emotional health.
“Many parents or other caretakers think that they should put all of their energy into their child’s needs and that taking out time for their own well-being is selfish,” says Andrew Malekoff, Executive Director of North Shore Child & Family Guidance Center. “Nothing could be further from the truth, because if you neglect your own health you won’t be able to be fully present when your child needs you.”
Parent Support Groups
Many groups exist for parents who are caring for children with all kinds of special needs, including mental health issues. Call North Shore Child & Family Guidance Center at (516) 626-1971 or email info@northshorechildguidance.org to ask about our support group and therapy offerings; visit NAMI’s website at namiqn.org/programs/family/ or email them at Office@namiqn.org; and for NAMI Huntington, visit www.nami-huntington.org/
The stress of caring for a child with mental health issues can be even harder than if your child has a physical illness, adds Malekoff. “In our society, there is still a stigma associated with mental illness, and that often stops people from asking for help. But even if they’ve taken the steps to get therapy or other treatment for their child, they often don’t realize or accept that they, too, need support.”
Taking care of your mind and body will help create the resilience and strength that you will need in your role as a caretaker. In celebration of National Wellness Month, following are seven wellness tips to keep in mind so you can be at your best for yourself and your children.
Get enough sleep. When you are overtired, it’s very difficult to function well. Take a break from time stealers like social media and television and use that time to rest!
Meditate. Numerous studies show that even a few minutes a day of meditation will help reduce your stress. Not sure how? Google “how to meditate” and you’ll find lots of helpful tips and videos. You can also google “meditation on long island” to find a group.
Exercise. Whether you go for a brisk walk, workout at a gym, or take a yoga class, the benefits of exercise are undeniable. Exercise boosts endorphins, those “feel good” chemicals, and also promotes relaxation.
Try massage, acupuncture or other body treatments. Don’t consider it a luxury; think of it as essential to keeping your strength up for the challenges of caretaking.
Take a break. That might mean going to a movie, engaging in a hobby or meeting with a friend.
Spend time in nature. A walk on the beach, hike in the woods or time tending to a garden are among the many options, all of which will help bring down your stress level.
Ask for help. Family and friends rally around you if your child has cancer. The good ones will want to be there for you when the issue is mental health, too.
Remember, being your best for your child requires taking care of yourself. Working on your wellness instead of feeling guilty is an essential part of helping everyone feel their very best.
Roslyn Heights, NY, August 2, 2018 — North Shore Child & Family Guidance Center held its 5th Annual Ladies’ Night Out event on Thursday evening, July 19th, at the beautiful Neiman Marcus Garden City store. This marked the second year in a row that the Guidance Center partnered with Neiman Marcus in an event that offered exceptional beauty services and raffle opportunities to the women of our local communities and also raised awareness of the programs and services offered by the Guidance Center.
All proceeds from the event will support the Guidance Center’s mission to provide help and healing to children and families dealing with mental health issues and to combat stigma and discrimination. Guests savored delicious small bites from NM Cafe and sipped unique bubbly libations while they were treated to brow shaping and makeovers by Neiman Marcus makeup artists, along with blow-outs and hair styling from Manhasset salon nuBest.
Carol Marcell, a member of the Guidance Center’s Board of Directors, brought her mother Joyce Bruno and two of Bruno’s friends. “This was the second time my mom and I attended Ladies’ Night Out, and she didn’t hesitate to accept my invitation once again and to bring along her friends,” says Marcell. “We got our hair blown out by a charming young man from nuBest. And all of us loved looking at the clothes, jewelry and shoes at wonderful Neiman Marcus!”
“Neiman Marcus Garden City is very proud to be a supporter of the North Shore Child & Family Guidance Center,” says Doris Wilshere, Vice President, General Manager at Neiman Marcus, Roosevelt Field. “It is our corporate philosophy to support and give back to our local community, particularly with organizations that are centered on children and family. Since our opening in 2016, we have been an ongoing partner with the Guidance Center and will be for the future. We look forward to a growing partnership.”
“The Guidance Center is grateful to the philanthropic team at Neiman Marcus,” says Nancy Lane, Board President. “The events we hold at the store are very special.”
About Us:
As the preeminent not-for-profit children’s mental health agency on Long Island, North Shore Child & Family Guidance Center is dedicated to restoring and strengthening the emotional well-being of children (from birth – age 24) and their families. Our highly trained staff of psychiatrists, psychologists, social workers, vocational rehabilitation counselors and other mental health professionals lead the way in diagnosis, treatment, prevention, training, parent education, research and advocacy. The Guidance Center helps children and families address issues such as depression and anxiety; developmental delays; bullying; teen pregnancy; sexual abuse; teen drug and alcohol abuse; and family crises stemming from illness, death, trauma and divorce. For 65years, the Guidance Center has been a place of hope and healing, providing innovative and compassionate treatment to all who enter our doors, regardless of their ability to pay. For more information about the Guidance Center, visit www.northshorechildguidance.org or call (516) 626-1971.
Although we’re in the so-called “dog days” of summer, there is still plenty of time to bring your kids outside to get a healthy dose of sunshine. And autumn, just around the corner, is also a perfect season to explore the outdoors with your kids.
Studies reveal many benefits of making nature a central part of your child’s world. Among them: an increase in self-esteem and resilience against stress, depression and adversity; improved concentration, learning, creativity, cooperation and self-awareness; and a decrease in childhood obesity.
At the Guidance Center’s Marks Family Right From the Start 0-3+ Center (RFTS), we integrate outdoor activities in the therapeutic process. In addition to an organic garden, RFTS has a Nature Nursery that is primarily designed for our early childhood population of children under 6 years old. The Nature Nursery features a variety of “tools,” including a rock and water garden, shells, pine cones, wind chimes and more, all designed to help children explore the sights, sounds, smells and touch of nature.
Bruce Kaufstein, Director of Clinical Services at the Guidance Center, describes how the children and their therapists have a variety of ways to experience all their senses as they play in a sandbox, touch the leaves and pine cones, produce musical sounds on percussive instruments, draw on a chalkboard or paint on an outdoor “canvas.”
“They are able to smell the aroma of an herb garden,” says Kaufstein. “They can explore and play music on a music board that contains pots and pans and shake maracas, castanets and other wooden instruments.A chalkboard and painting pallet provides the backdrop for recreating images and color of the nature they see around them.”
Vanessa McMullen, Supervisor at RFTS, says that many children are so connected to tech gadgets that they’ve lost touch with the natural world. “The various texture, sounds, smells and sights in the Nature Nursery help children explore their creative sides, and we also use it with the older children, to give them a natural, soothing space to experience positive visualization and deep breathing.”
According to Alicia Rabinowitz, LMSW at the Guidance Center, her young clients love going to the Nature Nursery and the adjacent organic garden. “My clients love to pick from the garden, wash and prepare in the kitchen, and then go out to picnic table in the Nature Nursery to have what we call our ‘Chat and Chew.’ I also use the walking tree stump trail created to assist clients with balance and to bring up topic of support and support systems.”
Of course, the benefits of our Nature Nursery can be found in natural settings all across our Island and beyond. Following are some of ideas of great outdoor activities you can do with your kids, from the Child Mind Institute:
Set up treasure hunts. Make a short, simple list of things for your kids to look for outside—such as “a shiny object,” or “something you can hold liquid in.” The satisfaction of finding the objects turns it into a reinforcing activity, and it will keep them outside in search of the next list item.
Identify things. Get a book—with pictures—about birds, bugs, leaves, trees, or flowers in your local area, and go outside looking for specific creatures in the book to identify.
Give them the tools to discover. Gifts like a bug box, a magnifying glass, or a shovel will promote ways to explore the outdoors with a fun new tool that feels professional and empowering.
Go to an outdoor performance. If your child can’t take her eyes off Nickelodeon, take her to a puppet show in the park. For older kids who like movies, take them to outdoor plays and musicals.
Start a collection. You can find small parts of nature like rocks or shells almost everywhere, and starting a collection gives a kid motivation to search and therefore spend time outdoors.
Use technology to your advantage. If your kid is hooked on electronic devices, have him bring along a camera or phone and create video or photo journals of various nature trips.
Plant a garden. Tracking the progress and seeing the eventual product of a seed your child planted provides a different, deeper sense of achievement than beating a difficult level in a video game or getting a lot of likes on your last Instagram.
Take a hike. Walking on a trail to a waterfall or breathtaking view also gives kids a sense of accomplishment, rewarding them for their physical efforts during the hike. This goes for bike rides, too.
Make art projects. For kids who would rather sit inside with some arts and crafts, get them to use objects from nature for their art. Picking flowers to press onto paper, using berry juice as paint, or collecting pinecones and rocks to decorate are ways to infuse nature into activities they already enjoy.
Build something. You can also reverse the process and make art with your kids that will support and nurture the natural world—things like bird feeders or flower boxes. Kids will keep coming back to watch an object they created provide for other living things.
On Long Island, black women and their babies are four times more likely to die during childbirth as their white neighbors. Why is this happening and what is being done to help save their lives?
