When faced with an ailing mother and husband, Karen Schief became a caregiver.
“At that point, I didn’t even know there was a name for what it was we did,” the Syosset resident says of caregiving.
Years later, Caring for the Caregiver, for which Schief serves as cochairman, began as a ministry at her church and now runs caregiving caring circles, as well as keeping a comprehensive database of support systems available to caregivers.
Caring for loved ones is a growing issue. According to The National Alliance For Caregiving and AARP, approximately 34.2 million people have provided unpaid care to an adult 50 years or older in the year 2015, the last year for which statistics are available. Further, the 2010 U.S. Census Bureau reports that one in every 26 families in the U.S. is raising a child with a disability.
Care for the Caregiver
Caregiving offers an opportunity to express love and compassion, but there are concomitant negative aspects. Most feel isolated and forget what life was like before being a caregiver, says Tara Anglim, director of Patient & Family Center Care at Peconic Bay Medical Center, a hospital-based caregiver support center on Long Island. Support group members, adds Anglim, validate each other’s emotional experience of caregiving through laughter, united feelings of frustration and sadness.
At Caring for the Caregiver, caring circles are non-disease specific. “We found that there were many people who were facing multiple issues,” says Schief. The caregivers themselves run the caring circles, explains Schief, “because if you have never been a caregiver you don’t understand what these people are going through.”
Caring for Children & Families
North Shore Child & Family Guidance Center offers an Intensive Support Program (ISP) of therapy and a nurturing alternative for children ages 5 to 21 and their families from all Nassau county school districts.
Part of the work of ISP, says Andrew Malekoff, executive director of the Guidance Center, involves providing psychoeducation for the child and parents to develop the coping skills necessary to improve their overall functioning at school, in the community and at home.
Parent to Parent, based in Hauppauge, provides information, guidance and support to families of children with developmental disabilities. Parent to parent matching, a popular program, connects parents in need of advice to other parents who’ve been through similar experiences.
Alzheimer’s Disease
In New York State, there are now one million Alzheimer’s and dementia unpaid caregivers. These figures are poised to rise as the number of people diagnosed with the disease is expected to triple by 2050.
In many cases, people care for loved ones at home for as long as they can and need their own support services, says Charles J. Fuschillo, Jr., president and CEO of the Alzheimer’s Foundation of America.
“Respite can be an invaluable resource to help family caregivers maintain their own sense of well-being,” he says, adding that respite can take the form of adult day programs and in-home aid.
Education is also key. Classes like Peconic Bay Medical Center’s “Dementia: Effective Communication and Behavioral Strategies” and “Long Term Care 101” are vital for proper care.
No matter who they care for and what conditions they’re contending with, help for the caregiver is available.
“We’re trying to make their journey easier,” says Schief.
In the immediate aftermath of the suicides of Kate Spade and Anthony Bourdain Gov. Cuomo issued a press release about new funding to address the rising rate of suicide.
He stated: “Two high-profile suicides this week put mental illness front and center, but while those names were the ones in the press, every day there are thousands of New Yorkers who struggle with suicidal thoughts, and we must do everything we can to support them. Depression does not discriminate. It affects every part of society and people from all walks of life.”
I applaud the Governor for bringing this matter to light. He stated, “Depression does not discriminate.” Nevertheless, health insurers that do not comply with federal parity law, denying timely access to care, do discriminate. When New York State government does not enforce this law, they aid and abet discrimination against the “thousands of New Yorkers,” who the Governor referred to as those “who struggle with suicidal thoughts”.
The difficulty people have accessing mental health and addiction care is not simply a matter of stigma. It is a matter of discrimination. This is a civil rights issue that an announcement of new funding alone will not solve.
On December 15, 2017, North Shore Child and Family Guidance Center held a press conference at its headquarters in Roslyn Heights and issued the results of a research study – Project Access that we conducted in collaboration with LIU Post Department of Social Work.
In this year-long study, hundreds of Long Islanders were surveyed about their experiences attempting to obtain help for mental health and addiction problems.
Of the 650 Long Islanders who took part in the survey, almost half said that it was more difficult finding help for mental health or substance abuse problems than finding help for physical illnesses, nearly 40 percent said that their insurance company did not have an adequate number of providers and two-thirds said that their insurance company was not helpful to them in finding a suitable provider for themselves or a loved one.
NY State Senator Todd Kaminsky, who attended the December 15th press conference, stated that the findings were “Damning.”
In a bipartisan effort, Kaminsky and Senator Elaine Phillips wrote to the Department of Financial Services (DFS) on January 9, 2018 citing the Project Access study and requesting “a thorough investigation to determine why insurance companies are not being held accountable for network adequacy.” Network adequacy is the part of the federal parity law that states that health insurers who cover mental health and addiction care must have an adequate number of providers in their network. Many more people wrote directly to Gov. Cuomo, requesting the same.
Almost five months later Scott Fischer, Executive Deputy Superintendent for Insurance, a division of DFS, responded in writing to the Senators. Fischer wrote: “DFS’s review of the various networks has confirmed that each of the insurance companies in Long Island exceeds the standards for mental health and substance use providers, for the purpose of the commercial products sold outside of NYSOH.”
Translation: There is no problem. There is nothing more to do. This does not square with the results of Project Access.
Health insurers and government ignoring federal parity law is discrimination. When it comes to suicide prevention: access delayed, is access denied.
Discriminationdeserves a place alongside stigmawhen the conversation turns to access to care.
It’s a matter of civil rights.
Long after the tragic deaths of Kate Spade and Anthony Bourdain fade from the front pages, the lack of compliance and enforcement of federal parity law will persist and the thousands of people that the Governor spoke of in hispress release will still be unable to access care.
oslyn Heights, NY, July 23, 2018 – On July 18, 2018, the Welcoming Club of Garden City presented North Shore Child & Family Guidance Center with a check for $30,000. The donation was the result of more than a dozen events the club held during the 2017-2018 season, all of which benefitted the Guidance Center. Just a sampling: a Halloween fair, Santa Christmas brunch, several movie nights and a fashion show.
One of their flagship fundraising events was held on May 15 as the Welcoming Club of Garden City hosted their Spring Soirée at the Garden City Hotel. The event featured fabulous boutique shopping, getting-to-know-you games, a Garden City trivia contest, great raffle prizes and a delicious buffet.
“It was a fun and fabulous night that allowed the ladies of the Welcoming Club of Garden City to come together with old friends and mix and mingle to meet new ones in a chic and festive atmosphere,” says Meg Dockery-Cremins, President of the Welcoming Club. “The Spring Soirée was the culmination of a year’s worth of family, couples and ladies events to benefit North Shore Child & Family Guidance Center. The wonderful vendors and community sponsors provided fabulous prizes which enabled us to make a generous donation to the Guidance Center, which we view as a critically important organization in the community.”
“We are so grateful to the members of the Welcoming Club of Garden City for making us the beneficiary of their events for this season,” says Lauren McGowan, Director of Development for the Guidance Center who, as a Garden City resident, also chaired the Philanthropic Committee for the Welcoming Club. “The funds that they raised will go directly to our core mission of helping Long Island children and their families who are in need of mental health or substance use care. We could not do our work without generous donations from community-minded organizations like the Welcoming Club.”
Meg Dockery-Cremins (center) presents a $30,000 check to Guidance Center Executive Director Andrew Malekoff and Director of Development Lauren McGowan.
From left, North Shore Child and Family Guidance Center Executive Director Andrew Malekoff, event co-chairs Mike Mondiello and Troy Slade, honoree Ed Haug and event founder Jeff Krevat. (Photo courtesy of North Shore Child and Family Guidance Center)
North Shore Child and Family Guidance Center, the preeminent not-for-profit children’s mental health agency on Long Island, once again hosted a joyful event filled with golf, tennis and an extraordinary dinner at our 22nd annual Jonathan Krevat Memorial Golf and Tennis Classic on June 18 at The Creek in Locust Valley.
The event raised more than $230,000 to support the guidance center’s work to bring hope and healing to children and families dealing with mental health or substance use challenges.
This year’s honoree was Ed Haug, Managing Partner of Haug Partners LLP, a pioneer East Coast law firm and provider of synthesized, multidisciplinary legal services for life science and technology businesses.
“Everyone had a great time on this magnificent golf course and on the tennis courts, and the elegant steak and lobster dinner was exquisite” said Haug. “But the most important thing is that we came together so that children and their families will continue to receive the life-saving services of North Shore Child & Family Guidance Center Guidance Center.”
The co-chairs for this year’s Krevat Cup were Mike Mondiello, Michael Schnepper and Troy Slade.
In addition, Dan Donnelly, last year’s honoree, served as the auctioneer at this year’s event.
“It’s all about the kids,” said Donnelly, a longtime support of the Guidance Center. “I consider it a privilege to be here today to help raise money to support the incredible work that truly makes a difference in the lives of children and their families.”
“We’re so grateful to all of the people who worked so hard to make this year’s event a huge success,” said Andrew Malekoff, executive director of the guidance center. “Their dedication to our work enables us to provide the services to all those who need them, despite their ability to pay.”
The daring cave rescue in Thailand was breathtaking. For a few moments, the world stood still.
Skilled divers, medical personnel and others united and prevailed to save the lives of 12 children and their soccer coach.
It was a time when thoughts and prayers were a welcome sentiment, as opposed to the cliché often uttered by politicians in the aftermath of a school shooting.
Meanwhile, one of the more disturbing and divisive stories in recent memory — the forcible separation of thousands of migrant children from their parents after crossing the southern border into the United States — remains.
What makes the migrant children story disturbing is obvious.
Although some people may be put off by the term “kids in cages,” the reality is that many of them are confined to chain-link pens that they are not permitted to leave.
Not so obvious are the nuances contained in the widely divergent and often politically motivated opinions about what brought them here in the first place.
Many believe the migrants were seeking asylum from violent gangs and terror.
Others say they were escaping poverty and looking for a free ticket into the U.S.
Still others insist that the bulk of the children were brought here not by parents but by human traffickers posing as parents and that they haven’t been separated but put into protective custody.
Whatever the reason they undertook the arduous and dangerous journey, the result is the same: Who is welcome here and who is not have become political flashpoints in post-truth America.
The juxtaposition of migrant children trapped in cages and children trapped in caves symbolizes a troubling paradox: Some children count and some don’t.
Thailand is a well-known destination for forced labor and sex trafficking of children.
Yet we are not riveted to the plight of these children, whose daily peril is not as well-exposed as the kids in caves.
The kids in caves made for great reality TV. It evoked Survivor, the reality show where contestants are stranded in an isolated location and a lone survivor takes home a cash prize. Cave Rescue was more compelling must-see TV, with life and death at stake.
When the kids in the cave were losing oxygen, tanks of air were delivered to them.
One man, a Thai Navy SEAL Saman Gunan, gave his life for the boys to breathe easier. These kids also had each other and a surrogate parent for emotional support.
There were volunteers from around the world pitching in and well-wishers everywhere.
But what of the kids in cages who are experiencing inconsolable grief and a prolonged stress response that is likely to derail their healthy development for many years to come? Who is there to rescue them?
What they are missing cannot be found in a metal canister. What they long for is human touch and a sense of hope.
The daring rescue in Thailand was a blessing for its exhilarating outcome and for what it made us feel about ourselves, if only for a moment. We all cared together.
If only there was some way to sustain that feeling and goodwill toward all of God’s children.
