by North Shore Child & Family Guidance Center | Oct 11, 2017 | Blog
Being a teenager brings with it many challenges, especially in a world where technology can spread a nasty message throughout a school in minutes.
But, while all teenagers face the prospect of being bullied, for teens who identify as LGBTQ (lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender or questioning), the statistics are especially alarming:
• LGBTQ youth are nearly twice as likely to be called names, verbally harassed or physically assaulted at school compared to their non-LGBTQ peers, according to Human Rights Watch.
• LGBTQ youth are four times more likely to attempt suicide than their heterosexual counterparts, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.
• The National Alliance on Mental Illness reports that LGBTQ individuals are nearly three times more likely to experience a mental health condition such as major depression or generalized anxiety disorder than their peers.
Over the last few years, North Shore Child & Family Guidance Center has seen a steady rise in the number of clients who identify as LGBTQ.
“At this age, most adolescents are experiencing some feelings of disenfranchisement, be it from peers or parents,” says Amanda Martin, a social worker at the Guidance Center who runs the group specifically for LGBTQ clients. “LGBTQ youth experience this at a much more intense level, coupled by fears of being abandoned, outed, physically hurt or completely ostracized by the ones they love.”
Meaghan Miller, a mental health counselor at the Guidance Center, says that when one of her teen clients first came here for treatment for anxiety and alcohol abuse, it became clear that her identity as an LBGTQ individual was a major cause of her mental health and alcohol issues. She had bravely come out to her mother, but the reaction was devastating. “Her mother said ‘People can’t know this, what did I do wrong, what will people say about me?’ ” says Miller.
Miller advises parents to keep the lines of communication open with their children. “Parents need to engage with their child by asking questions, listening and verbalizing their support and love,” she says.
Schools can also play a crucial role in supporting their LGBTQ students. They should have an anti-bullying policy or code of conduct that includes language specifically prohibiting harassment of LGBTQ-identified students.
The services these individuals receive at the Guidance Center are in many ways similar to the services all of our clients receive, but with an added awareness and sensitivity to the issues that come with being LGBTQ in our society.
“For these kids, if they have not come out to their families and/or friends, it can manifest in many mental health-related ways, including depression, anxiety, isolation, self-harm, suicidal ideation/thinking, planning or acting on suicidal feelings,” says Martin. “Our work is helping these kids find a support system so they feel safe and conducting family therapy to develop acceptance regarding the child as a whole person, not solely this one aspect defining the relationship they have with the people in their lives.”
We’re always working to meet the needs of the community with expanded programming. For more information, follow us on our Facebook page; visit our website, www.northshorechildguidance.org; or call us at (516) 626-1971.
Sources: https://www.hrw.org/report/2016/12/07/walking-through-hailstorm/discrimination-against-lgbt-youth-us-schools
https://www.cdc.gov/lgbthealth/youth.htm
https://www.nami.org/Find-Support/LGBTQ
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by North Shore Child & Family Guidance Center | Oct 10, 2017 | Press Releases
North Shore Child & Family Guidance Center Lets the Light Shine In With Tour of Historic Whispered Wishes Headquarters
Also announces capital campaign for major windows renovation project
Roslyn Heights, NY, October 5, 2017 — The past came to life on October 3rd as North Shore Child & Family Guidance Center hosted a luncheon at its Roslyn Heights headquarters, known as “Whispered Wishes,” featuring a visit by one of the home’s former occupants.
Whispered Wishes today, which is the Guidance Center’s main headquarters.
Mary Jo Balkind, the granddaughter of one of the building’s early owners, financier and industrialist Charles C. Auchincloss, lived in the Guidance Center’s headquarters during WW II when she was a young girl. She enthusiastically shared many stories of those years with the luncheon’s guests, which included board members, donors and New York State Senator Elaine Phillips.
“It was a working farm,” said Balkind, who lived in the home with her grandparents, mother and siblings. “We had pigs, cows and chickens, along with a tennis court and stable. It was a great place to live.”
Another interesting point of history: Balkind’s sister Rosie was best friends with future First Lady Jacqueline Bouvier Kennedy, who visited the home often as a young girl.
Buck and Leslie Balkind with Buck’s mother Mary Jo Balkind and her drawing of the original estate’s layout.
The history of the building—one of the oldest in the East Hills area—is quite fascinating, said Howard Kroplick, Town Historian for the Town of North Hempstead. Whispered Wishes, formerly named “Builtover” by Charles Auchincloss when he purchased the home in 1905, was originally part of a 46-acre property owned by the Willets and Taber families, early settlers of Long Island.
Well-known architecture firm Peabody, Wilson and Brown was hired by Auchincloss to update the original home and turn it into a 25-room Georgian Revival mansion. He also hired the famed Olmstead Brothers, who designed Central Park, as architects for the grounds in 1917.
Kroplick stated, “This is a building that does so many wonderful things for the community. It should be cherished and preserved.”
John Grillo, Senator Elaine Phillips, Guidance Center Executive Director Andrew Malekoff and Board President Nancy Lane.
Gold Coast historian Paul J. Mateyunas gave the audience a tour of the home, pointing out its numerous original features, from fireplaces to sconces to cast iron heating grates to a call box for the servants. “This is an amazing example of preservation,” said Mateyunas.
Since the Guidance Center purchased the home in 1983, preserving its beauty and structural integrity has been of utmost importance. Executive Director Andrew Malekoff told the luncheon guests that the Guidance Center is embarking on a crucial renovation project to keep the “warm and welcoming” feeling for all of the Guidance Center’s clients.
“We’re very grateful to Senator Phillips for helping us secure $100,000 toward the windows project from the Dormitory Authority of New York State,” said Malekoff, noting that the cost to replace all 120 windows will be approximately $1.2 million.
Jacqueline Bouvier Kennedy with Rosie Balkind in front of the home’s barn.
For her part, Mary Jo Balkind is thrilled that her former childhood home is a place where helping children and families in need of mental health services is paramount. “I’m so thankful that the Guidance Center has preserved the beauty of this house. They’ve also preserved the spiritual essence of the building. There is the most wonderful atmosphere here; from the moment you walk in you can feel it. It makes me so happy that the Guidance Center is here.”
To learn more about the windows renovation project, please contact Director of Development Lauren McGowan at LMcGowan@northshorechildguidance.org or call (516) 626-1971, ext. 320.
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by North Shore Child & Family Guidance Center | Oct 5, 2017 | In The Media
From Anton Media’s Roslyn News Oct. 4-10, 2017
by North Shore Child & Family Guidance Center | Oct 5, 2017 | Blog
Do you know someone with a mental illness? Odds are that, even if you don’t know it, you have a friend, colleague or a family member who experiences some form of mental illness, whether it’s severe depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder or a host of other conditions.
This week has been designated as Mental Illness Awareness Week, and it’s a good time to look at some facts that might surprise you: According to the National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH), 1 in 5 youth aged 13–18 (21.4%) experiences a severe mental disorder at some point during their life. For children aged 8–15, the estimate is 13%.
Although more children suffer from psychiatric illness than autism, leukemia, diabetes and AIDS combined, only one of five with an emotional disturbance gets treatment from a mental health specialist.
Andrew Malekoff, Executive Director of North Shore Child & Family Guidance Center, asks, “Why do we continue to treat illnesses above the neck differently than illnesses below the neck? The sad truth is that, although there has been some progress, there’s still a stigma about mental health. The result is that parents often wait months or even years to ask for help.”
The National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) states that the consequences of stigma are far-reaching and potentially devastating. Stigma means that people living with mental health conditions are:
- Alienated and seen as “others.”
- Perceived as dangerous.
- Seen as irresponsible or unable to make their own decisions.
- Less likely to be hired.
- Less likely to get safe housing.
- More likely to be criminalized than offered health care services.
- Afraid of rejection to the point that they don’t always pursue opportunities.
How can you help end the stigma?
The first step, says Malekoff, is to educate yourself about mental health and mental illness so you can challenge misconceptions, myths and generalizations about people with mental health problems. Both the NIMH and NAMI websites are great resources, as is the Bring Change to Mind site.
Some more suggestions from Malekoff:
- Be aware of language that you use that reinforces stigma, like saying someone is “crazy” or “psycho” or “a nut job,” for example.
- Eliminate the phrase “suffers from mental illness” and replace it with “lives with mental illness” or “is affected by mental illness.” I.e., instead of saying “Joe is bipolar,” say “Joe is living with bipolar disorder.”
- Be thoughtful and empathic when communicating with someone who is suffering from a mental illness such as anxiety or depression, or with a parent whose child might be struggling with a mental health problem.
- Don’t avoid the subject; instead, ask questions in a supportive manner if you’re not sure what is happening. For example, you might say, “I don’t mean to pry but it seems like you’re struggling. I’m here for you if you need me.”
- Understand that people suffering from mental illness are not the sum of their broken, hurt or troubled parts, but they are whole people; try to relate to the whole person, not just the broken parts.
Take a look at this video from Bring Change to Mind for more on how to end the stigma: https://youtu.be/rcUmmNLHW9A
Sources:
https://www.nami.org/Get-Involved/Awareness-Events/Mental-Illness-Awareness-Week
https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/statistics/prevalence/any-disorder-among-children.shtml
http://bringchange2mind.org/talk/choose-your-words/
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by North Shore Child & Family Guidance Center | Sep 27, 2017 | Anton Media
New legislation signed by Governor Cuomo in 2016 requires that public schools in New York State begin providing instruction in mental health on or after July 1, 2018. The legislation was co-sponsored by Senator Carl Marcellino (R-Nassau) and Assemblywoman Kathy Nolan (D-Queens).
The new legislation adds mental health education to areas of learning that were already required by law, including education on the use and misuse of alcohol, tobacco and other substances and the early detection of cancer.
According to Glen Liebman, CEO of the Mental Health Association in New York State, “By ensuring that young people are educated about mental health, we increase the likelihood that they will be able to recognize signs in themselves and others that indicate when help is needed and how to get help.”
Why is this legislation so important? One in five adolescents ages 13-18 is diagnosed with a mental health problem, yet only 40% get help. The average time from onset to seeking help is eight to 10 years. According to Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, one in 12 high school students attempt suicide, the third leading cause of death for 10 to 24 year olds.
Teaching about mental health in schools and educating to reduce stigma is long overdue. There is great misunderstanding and fear among many who have erroneous ideas about people with mental illness. Consequently, young people suffering with mental illness walk around school feeling isolated, believing that there’s something inherently wrong with them that will never change.
These children and teens often feel shunned, unlike their peers who have a physical health problem and who have others rally around them. I can vividly recall a news report and photo of a middle school boy afflicted with cancer who was receiving chemotherapy. In the photo he was surrounded by his teacher and a smiling group of his classmates, all of whom shaved their heads in solidarity with him. Imagine if instead of cancer he was depressed and suicidal. There would be no such image of public support, only one of isolation, shame and despair.
A caring school community can offer a young person a safety net of meaningful and helpful connections. It is not unusual for a teenager to feel defective when struggling alone with a mental illness. Mental health education in schools can begin with mental wellness practices for children as early as four or five years old, for example, by teaching social skills and how to manage angry feelings.
As children grow they can learn about the concept of wellness including self-care and personal responsibility. They can learn to recognize the signs and symptoms of developing mental health problems, how to manage crises such as the risk of suicide and self-harm and how to identify appropriate services and supports for treating and maintaining recovery from mental illness.
I can already hear those voices that will decry using educational resources for addressing the emotional needs of kids. If that is your view, I ask you to consider that approximately 50% of students age 14 and older who are living with a mental illness drop out of high school. Youngsters’ mental health and their ability to learn and become productive citizens in the community and workplace go hand-in-hand.
We owe it to our children to support this vital new legislation by encouraging schools to incorporate meaningful education into the curriculum that reinforces the idea that mental health is an integral part of wellbeing. Our children need to learn that there is help that can lead to recovery.
Bio: Andrew Malekoff is the Executive Director and CEO of North Shore Child & Family Guidance Center, which provides comprehensive mental health services for children from birth through 24 and their families. To find out more, visit www.northshorechildguidance.org.
from Anton Media, Sept. 27-Oct. 3, 2017
