Although we’ve had a relatively warm and snow-free winter thus far on Long Island, that doesn’t mean that those who experience SAD, or seasonal affective disorder, have escaped the depressive symptoms that accompany this mood disorder.
Starting as early as October or November, people with SAD—about six percent of the U.S. population, primarily in northern regions—begin to experience depression that is related to the lack of sunlight, less time outdoors and cold temperatures. More than simply the “winter blues,” this condition is characterized by feelings of sadness and hopelessness nearly every day. People with SAD are unable to enjoy the activities that typically make them happy; they have difficulty concentrating and are often tired and/or agitated.
Another 14 percent suffers from a lesser form of SAD, whose symptoms include low energy, weight gain, craving carbohydrates and social withdrawal.
Some other statistics: Females are about four times more likely to develop SAD than their male counterparts. People with a history of depression are more prone to experiencing symptoms of SAD.
Here are some strategies to get you through the winter, whether you experience full-blown SAD or the milder winter blues:
Get as much direct exposure to sunlight as possible.
Since being out in the sun can be difficult this time of year, either due to cold temperatures or long workdays inside, consider purchasing artificial “sunbox” lights. Their special fluorescent tubes mimic the sun’s beneficial rays (plain lights don’t have the same effect).
Keep or start an exercise routine. If it’s not too cold out and it’s a sunny day, try to walk outside to reap the benefits of being in natural sunshine—but even if you work out indoors, it will have a positive impact on your mood.
Turn up the heat (between 64 and 70 degrees) and drink hot beverages.
Eat healthy foods, with a focus on fruits and vegetables. That’s good advice any time of year, but especially important in winter when your cravings for sugar and carbohydrates tend to increase.
Don’t give in to the urge to isolate. Seeing friends and attending social functions are crucial to putting a damper on the blues.
Keep active by engaging your creative side, whether it be taking up a new hobby or reintroducing a former favorite pastime. Take advantage of classes at your adult education center or library. Not only will your spirits pick up, but you may make some new social connections.
Take up meditation and other mindfulness-based practices. You can find literally thousands of guided meditations on a free app called Insight Timer.
Children and teens are not immune to depression that comes during the fall and winter months, although it more commonly starts in young adulthood. If your child is experiencing depression that impacts their ability to function, whatever the season, it’s important to seek help from a mental health professional. To contact North Shore Child & Family Guidance Center, call (516) 626-1971.
Community members attended the March for Change in honor of Thomas Valva on Feb. 8 at Heckscher State Park in Suffolk County. Credit: Shelby Knowles
My head is still spinning after reading “How the system failed Tommy” [News, Feb. 16], a story about the tragic death of 8-year-old Thomas Valva.
The harrowing story has a Rashomon quality of contradictory interpretations of events by many individuals charged with protecting Thomas.
I did find a few constants in the story. Although unstated, Thomas likely experienced traumatic stress from being maltreated and then subjected to a long line of presumably well-meaning strangers, charged with determining how to best keep him safe. The other constant was his mother’s repeated warnings to the authorities that “his life is in danger.”
The system did indeed fail Thomas, yet no one individual was reported to have stated that they made any missteps.
For the sake of Thomas’ legacy, some degree of individual responsibility will have to be taken to advance systemic change.
Andrew Malekoff, Long Beach
Editor’s note: The writer is executive director of the nonprofit children’s mental health center, North Shore Child and Family Guidance Center in Roslyn Heights.
Long Islanders are very lucky to have one of the best public library systems in the country. In Nassau County alone, there are 54 libraries!
When you think of libraries, likely the first thing that comes to mind is (you guessed it) books—and being able to peruse thousands upon thousands of books at your library or at home is certainly a wonderful thing! But libraries offer a wide variety of services, some of which might surprise you.
Libraries are a real treasure for parents, children and teens. Most have preschool story times that foster early literacy, along with music classes and play time. They also have quiet study areas where students can do their schoolwork or meet up with their tutor (who may be a volunteer provided by the library). Many have book clubs for people of all ages, a great way to encourage love of reading and to meet new friends.
Adults and youngsters can enjoy a bunch of entertainment options, as many libraries host movies and music/theater performances. Art exhibits are another popular offering, which gives local artists a chance to exhibit their work. Arts and crafts classes are another popular option.
Libraries are great places to hear experts and take classes on a huge range of topics: preparing wills, tax help, learning Mah Jong, travel tips, writing your memoir, line dancing, yoga, defensive driving, job fairs, computer savvy, saving for college—the list is endless.
These days, most if not all libraries offer computer and internet access, which opens up a world of information to those who may not have access at home, or who may prefer to spend some time out of their house and in the warm embrace of their local library.
Librarians can help you find reference materials (whether paper or electronic) on a host of subjects, from career information to car repair to medical resources to town history—just ask and you will likely be given a great launching pad for your search into numerous interests.
If you love spending time at the library, there are many volunteer opportunities, such as reading to little ones, tutoring, helping new citizens learn English and much more.
This is National Library Lover’s Month, but any time of year is a perfect time to make a trip to your local library!
Love Learning?
Why not share that love by volunteering with the Guidance Center’s tutoring program? Please contact Lauren McGowan at (516) 626-1971, ext. 320, lmcgowan@northshorechildguidance.org.
The teen years are a time of exploration, and forming friendships and intimate relationships is a large part of the adolescent experience. While this can be a very joyful time, for some young people, what starts out as a positive relationship can turn dangerous.
February has been set aside as National Teen Dating Violence Awareness and Prevention Month. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, teen dating violence includes four types of behavior:
Physical violence is when a person hurts or tries to hurt a partner by hitting, kicking or using another type of physical force.
Sexual violence is forcing or attempting to force a partner to take part in a sex act, sexual touching or a non-physical sexual event (e.g., sexting) when the partner does not or cannot consent.
Psychological aggression is the use of verbal and non-verbal communication with the intent to harm another person mentally or emotionally and/or exert control over another person.
Stalking is a pattern of repeated, unwanted attention and contact by a partner that causes fear or concern for one’s own safety or the safety of someone close to the victim.
Sadly, dating violence among teenagers is far more common than you might expect. The statistics: Nearly 1 in 11 female and 1 in 15 male high schoolers experienced physical dating violence last year, while 1 in 9 female and 1 in 36 male students were victims of sexual dating violence.
In addition, technology has made it possible for abusers to reach their victims 24/7 and abuse them on a wide scale through social media.
According to Elissa Smilowitz, Director of Triage and Emergency at North Shore Child & Family Guidance Center, “The goal of perpetrators of verbal and physical abuse is to make their partners feel worthless so they can be controlled,” says. “The abuser, who often has low self-esteem, is threatened by any sign of independence from their significant other, and that jealousy causes them to engage in physical, sexual, psychological and/or emotional violence.”
How is a parent to know if their child is being abused? Some signs:
Your child’s partner is extremely jealous or possessive.
You notice unexplained marks or bruises.
Your child’s partner emails or texts excessively.
You notice that your child is depressed or anxious.
Your child stops participating in extracurricular activities or other interests.
Your child stops spending time with other friends and family.
Your child’s partner abuses other people or animals.
Your child begins to dress differently.
It can be difficult to convince a teen that their partner is being abusive. “We have to help them come to the conclusion on their own that this is an unhealthy relationship and that it’s OK to seek out help,” says Smilowitz. “Through individual and group therapy, we can help give them the strength and tools to recognize that their relationship is toxic and learn what a loving, respectful relationship is like.”
Smilowitz advises parents to monitor their kids’ social media usage, and to keep an open dialogue. “If you notice changes in behavior, such as isolation and depression, ask them directly what’s going on. They need to know you are there to listen to them without judgment.”
If you are concerned that your child or teen may be the victim of abuse, call North Shore Child & Family Guidance Center at (516) 626-1971.
You can also call the 24-hour hotline at the Safe Center LI at (516) 542-0404.
When you look back on your youth, chances are that you can think of one or perhaps several people who shared their wisdom and guidance with you. Perhaps it was a favorite teacher or coach. Maybe it was a volunteer with an organization like the Girl Scouts or Boy Scouts. Or maybe your mentor was someone who helped you navigate the landscape at your first job.
When you look back on your youth, chances are that you can think of one or perhaps several people who shared their wisdom and guidance with you. Perhaps it was a favorite teacher or coach. Maybe it was a volunteer with an organization like the Girl Scouts or Boy Scouts. Or maybe your mentor was someone who helped you navigate the landscape at your first job.
However they came into your life, these mentors likely played a fundamental part in your development, setting the foundation for a successful future.
Mentors share not only their knowledge, but also their encouragement. They are your cheerleaders, letting you know not only how to succeed, but instilling in you the belief that you can succeed. Knowing that someone believes in you can change the trajectory of your life.
But mentoring doesn’t only benefit the mentee. Mentors and other types of volunteers often say they get more out of the relationship than they could have imagined, with their own feelings of happiness, well-being and purpose in life increased dramatically.
At North Shore Child & Family Guidance Center, we are blessed to have many people who serve as mentors. Our Board Members all have expertise in a variety of areas, from marketing to finances, and we are thankful that they share their expertise with us.
Outside of our board, dedicated supporters such as Michael Leeds and Dan Donnelly provide us with guidance on a host of issues. And partners such as Neiman Marcus Roosevelt Field, National Grid and PSEG Long Island also make meaningful contributions as volunteers.
We’re so grateful to all of those who contribute to our mission, as their generosity plays a vital role in enabling us to provide lifesaving services to the children and families in our community.
How You Can Help
North Shore Child & Family Guidance Center counts on mentors to devote their time and compassion by volunteering for two of our programs. At our Children’s Center at Nassau County Family Court, we provide care and an early learning environment to children ages six weeks to 12 years while their parents or guardians are conducting court business. Volunteers read and play with the children, and that interaction is sometimes the most rewarding time the children (and the volunteers!) have all week.
With our Learning to Learn Center tutoring program, volunteers offer to tutor students from the early grades through high school. We’re always looking for tutors with knowledge in all areas, including math, science, reading and more.
All volunteers (18 or older) have their own unique schedules and flexibility.
If you are interested in volunteering at the Children’s Center at Nassau County Family Court, please contact Dr. Nellie Taylor-Walthrust at (516) 997-2926, ext. 229, or email NTaylorWalthrust@northshorechildguidance.org.
To find out more about our tutoring program, contact Gerri Lima at (516) 997-2926, ext. 239, or email GLima@northshorechildguidance.org.
If your company is interested in creating a volunteer initiative with the Guidance Center, please contact Lauren McGowan at (516) 626-1971, ext. 320 or email LMcGowan@northshorechildguidance.org.
Help someone realize their potential. We all have unique talents and gifts. Activating the potential in someone by celebrating their talents empowers them to improve their own life, achieve their goals, and help others.
Give back to your community. The most impactful way to improve your community is to spend time investing in it. Mentoring youth in your community is a powerful way to invest in the next generation.
Learn more about yourself. Meaningful relationships are a two-way street. Learn more about your strengths, weaknesses, knowledge, experience and beliefs by sharing them with someone else.
Change someone’s life. An intentional relationship has the power to alter a person’s life – particularly youth – for the better. You may be the only stable, positive impact in a youth’s life. The ripple effect is tremendous.
Become a better leader. Investing in the life of someone else challenges your perspective, sharpens your interpersonal skills, and exposes you to different decision-making approaches. Mentoring gives you the opportunity to learn by doing.
