Tis the season of gift-giving, and though many things have changed because of the pandemic, kids are as excited as ever about receiving a bounty of toys!
For parents whose children may have special needs, the good news is that there are many toys that are designed for a variety of developmental and educational profiles—just google “toys for special needs” and you’ll come up with dozens of companies.
As with any year, safety is paramount when choosing toys. The potential dangers are clear: The U.S. Computer Product Safety Commission reports that in 2019, there were an estimated 162,700 toy-related, emergency department-treated injuries and 14 deaths to children younger than 15, with most of the deaths associated with choking on small parts such as small balls, small toy parts and riding toys.
The pandemic has led many people to shop for toys online rather than stores—not a bad thing in and of itself, but it does present a potential problem. “Our concern is that there may be an increase in counterfeit toys out there,” says Joan Lawrence,Senior Vice President, Standards and Regulatory Affairs at The Toy Association, a not-for-profit trade association. “If those sellers skirt the rules on intellectual property [by selling counterfeits], then we worry they may also skirt the rules on safety.”
Her recommendation: Buy toys on a website owned by the toy manufacturer or on a big box retailer website. “Look for verified sellers, whatever marketplace you buy from online,” she says.
While it can be difficult to identify who the verified sellers are, major brands are good bets, because they are likely to abide by safety regulations. Lawrence adds, “Does the seller have its own website? If not, it may be red flag. And if there are typos in the listing or poorly photoshopped images, those are clues that it may have been put together on the fly.”
Another important piece of advice from Lawrence: Parents should always check and follow age guidance on toy packaging. The age-grading isn’t about how smart your child is—it’s safety guidance that’s based on the developmental skills and abilities of children at a given age, and the specific features of a toy.
Following are some more safety tips from The Toy Association:
Adults should always supervise play, especially for younger children.
Avoid toys with small parts when shopping for children under age three and children who mouth toys. Test the size of toys and other objects around the home with a Small Parts Tester.
Check to see that plush (stuffed) toys have age-appropriate features such as embroidered or well-secured eyes and noses for younger children, and seams that are reinforced to withstand an older child’s play.
Dispose of all unnecessary toy packaging and gift-wrap as soon as possible (piles of discarded gift-wrap can conceal sharp objects and the edges of hard plastic packaging that can cut small fingers).
Read instructions carefully. Save directions, warranties and assembly hardware.
Regularly sort through the toy box to discard broken toys.
Get on the floor and play with your kids! Demonstrating the correct way to use a toy or game is the best way to make sure your child understands how to properly and safely enjoy it.
North Shore Child & Family Guidance Center’s therapists are experts on the use of toys and games to enhance social and emotional growth and well-being, says Paul Vitale, Executive Vice President Finance & Operations at The Toy Association and President of the Board of Directors of the Guidance Center. “I’m proud to be part of an organization that always puts the health, happiness and safety of children at the top of the list.”
Sensory Play Ideas for Children with Special Needs
Here are some great ideas for things to do with your child who may be on the autism spectrum, diagnosed with ADHD or OCD or have any sensory processing disorder, from The Genius of Playwebsite:
Get Your Beat On Sounding out words, while critical to language skill development, can sometimes be a challenge− especially if a word has multiple syllables. Turn frustration into fun by putting it to music. Tap/shake an instrument as kids say each syllable. Music can also allow a child struggling to verbalize words a way to express themselves and their understanding.
Surprise Box Think of this like a surprise sensory bin. Exploring an unknown object in a safe space can help decrease your child’s discomfort and fear of new unknowns in the future, while also aiding their processing and communication skill development. Try using uniquely shaped or textured objects!
Puppet Play Puppets can serve as versatile tools for play and learning. Beyond communicating their emotions, puppets can also be used to practice conversational skills and reinforce learned tasks by having kids teach it to the puppet.
Big Art Allowing kids to take movement breaks throughout the day can help them to reset and refocus. Why not turn it into art? Grab some chalk and/or washable markers and let kids use their whole bodies to create larger-than-life designs.
Basket Toss Who says a laundry basket is just for dirty clothes? Use it for game time and help build up a child’s gross motor skills in the process.
Freeze Dance Movement of any kind is great for helping develop a child’s sense of body awareness and balance. Adding a “freeze” element to your dance party can also support kids’ ability to process, organize, and respond to different sounds.
Pregnancy and childbirth are exciting times in a family’s life, filled with joy and awe. For some mothers, however, the situation is far more complex. While many women experience some mild mood changes during or after the birth of a child, 15 to 20 percent of women have more significant symptoms of postpartum depression and other perinatal mood and anxiety disorders or PMADs.
Fifteen to 20 percent of women have more significant symptoms of postpartum depression and other perinatal mood and anxiety disorders or PMADs.
At North Shore Child & Family Guidance Center, we work with moms and pregnant women whose symptoms may include feelings of sadness, irritability, guilt, lack of interest in the baby and changes in eating and sleeping habits. Some also experience trouble concentrating, thoughts of hopelessness and even thoughts of harming the baby or herself. Research shows that the pandemic has increased the incidents of PMADs, and also heightened symptoms. One study found that the rate of symptoms of depression in new mothers amid the pandemic was nearly three times the rate of new mothers’ symptoms pre-pandemic.
The reality is that, as with so much about the virus, there are still many unknowns as to the impact of COVID-19 during pregnancy and for babies and young children, which creates enormous stress. Being a new mother can be isolating under normal circumstances, but during the quarantine and social distancing protocols, the sense of isolation has been greatly magnified. Expectant and new parents are concerned about a host of issues, from financial and job stability to the health of their babies and themselves.
The pregnancy and birth experience, especially during the height of the pandemic, was anything but normal. Many pregnant women and new moms had to go to their doctor’s appointments by themselves, and if they got bad news, they had no one with them to lean on. Most had no baby showers, no visits from grandparents, no birthday parties—even an absence of partners in the hospital before, during and after the birth. They often had very little support from friends and relatives who typically help the new parents in the days after the baby comes home, for fear of catching or transmitting the virus.
Families who have school-aged children have had to struggle with the decision of whether or not to send them back to the classroom, where they may be exposed to the virus and bring it home to the family. Even though New York has improved in terms of COVID-19 numbers since the height of the pandemic, being cautious is still important, and we have no way of knowing what the next several months will bring. And the fact that all of us will be inside more will likely present significant challenges.
The good news is that North Shore Child & Family Guidance Center has been able to serve these moms and families during the pandemic through remote therapy, either by video or phone. In addition to individual and family therapy, the Guidance Center has continued to offer remote group counseling, so parents don’t feel so alone. Our psychiatrists are also seeing clients remotely, in the cases where medication is needed.
Through our Diane Goldberg Maternal Depression Program, the Guidance Center provides:
• Screening and assessments • Individual, couple and family therapy • Crisis intervention consultation • Psychiatric evaluations and medication management, where needed • Support groups • Back-to-work family support • Help with self-care
As one new mother told us, “You’ve been my lifeline during this time when I needed connection and reassurance and support.” If you or someone you love is experiencing symptoms of postpartum depression or other perinatal mood disorders, call the Guidance Center at 516-626-1971 and tell them you are seeking help for maternal depression. We are here for you.
Vanessa McMullan, LCSW, is supervisor at The Marks Family Right from the Start 0-3+ Center at North Shore Child & Family Guidance Center. She also heads up the organization’s Diane Goldberg Maternal Depression Program. Call 516-626-1971 or visit www.northshorechildguidance.org to learn more.
Olivia’s first visit to the E.R. for self-harm and suicidal thoughts came last fall, when she was just 14 years old. But instead of admitting her, the hospital referred her to North Shore Child & Family Guidance Center.
We saw her the very next day — an unheard of rapid response at most mental health centers, which often take weeks or even months to schedule appointments.
Olivia thrived in our Latina Girls Project, an innovative bilingual and bicultural therapeutic program that addresses the unique challenges affecting Latinas and transforms these vulnerable girls into happy, healthy young women.
Then COVID-19 hit. Olivia’s mother contracted the virus, and the teen watched helplessly as her mother battled the disease for two months.
When Olivia missed her virtual appointments, her therapist Anna asked Olivia to attend an in-person appointment. Anna realized immediately that the girl had lost weight and desperately needed help. Anna began seeing Olivia and her family for therapy three times a week remotely and connected them with an eating disorder specialist. At the Guidance Center, we treat the whole child, not just their symptoms.
Thankfully, Olivia’s mother is now well, and so is Olivia. She told Anna, “I can’t believe I ever thought I wanted to kill myself. I feel so much better!”
This story could have had a very different ending, but thanks to you, we are able to bring children from hurting to healing every day — which is especially important as the pandemic continues to threaten the mental health of our kids. Please consider making a gift this holiday season to ensure that children like Olivia can live happy and healthy lives. With gratitude,
Paul Vitale, President
P.S. The future of our children is in your hands. Please support our lifesaving mission today.
In this new monthly column, therapists from North Shore Child & Family Guidance Center will be answering your questions on issues related to parenting, mental health and children’s well-being. To submit a question, email NSCFGCexperts@gmail.com.
Question:We’ve recently been concerned that our teen daughter seems to be feeling more blue than usual. Her grades have been going down, and she wants to sleep all the time. When we ask her how she’s doing, she gets very emotional. Should we be worried?
—Panicked Parents
Dear Panicked Parents: The pandemic has created an enormous amount of anxiety and sadness for all of us, including our kids. We’ve been dealing with this strange, new reality for eight months now, and there’s no clear answer as to when we will turn the corner and be back to our routines.
The fact that your daughter is feeling stressed and sad isn’t surprising; in fact, studies indicate that these feelings are on the rise all over the country. Changes in sleep and eating patterns are common, as are struggles with the unusual school schedule. Kids are also worried that their loved ones may become ill.
It’s crucial that you always keep the lines of communication open. As parents, we tend to jump in to try to “fix” what’s wrong, instead of realizing that sometimes, your child just needs you to listen and be empathetic, acknowledging their feelings and assuring them you are there for them.
There are some things you can do to help your daughter, and yourselves, during this challenging time. Basics like eating healthy foods, exercising regularly, spending time outside in the fresh air and setting up a regular school and sleep routine can make a big difference.
Of course, it’s important to look out for signs that your daughter’s issues might be more significant and require therapeutic intervention. Some warning signs: a continued drop in grades or refusal to go to school; withdrawing from friends and family; significant changes in weight, either losing or gaining; the inability to feel joy; increased anger; physical complaints like headaches or stomachaches; use of drugs or alcohol; and expressing thoughts of suicide or preoccupation with death.
At North Shore Child & Family Guidance Center, we are seeing children and teens via remote therapy during this time, or in person when the situation calls for it. Don’t hesitate to call us at (516) 626-1971 for an evaluation.
Question:My eight-year-old son is in school two days a week and home the other three doing remote learning. While he’s been on this schedule for over two months now, he still struggles at times. What can I do to help?
—Port Washington Mom
Dear PW Mom: It’s common for kids of any age to have difficulty remaining focused on their remote schoolwork, since being at home offers up all sorts of temptations and distractions.
While it can be hard for parents to manage their children’s classwork alongside their own work and other responsibilities, familiarize yourself with your son’s school schedule to ensure he attends online classes and doesn’t miss assignments.
Another way to set him up for success is to create a small, quiet area where he can attend classes and do his homework. You can make it more appealing by personalizing the space with poster boards decorated with name tags, stickers and maybe some favorite photos.
Here are a few more pointers for all parents:
Encourage movement – build in time for exercise and movement before and during your child’s school activities.
Reduce distractions including noise and visual clutter.
Enlist your child in setting up a designated workspace that is comfortable.
Give your child, and yourself, breaks during the day.
Particularly for young children, give immediate positive feedback like a sticker or check mark on completed work to help with their motivation.
