Celebrating During the Pandemic

Celebrating During the Pandemic

Thanksgiving is just days away, which means Christmas, Hannukah and other celebrations are not far behind! 

The calendar at this time of year is typically loaded with gatherings of friends and family, where we get a chance to express our gratitude to those we love and have fun.  But with the pandemic still raging, holiday plans are anything but typical.

While things will be different this year, that doesn’t mean they can’t still be joyful. Here are some ways to help your kids cope with the changes that revised planning may bring.

First, make sure you allow your children and teens to express their disappointment, anger and sadness. It’s hard enough for adults to deal with missing our normal get-togethers, but for kids, it feels even bigger. Not being able to see grandparents, cousins and other family members is sad; let them know you feel the same way, but that you have high hopes things will return to normal for next year’s holiday season. 

Thanksgiving is all about expressing gratitude. Around your table this year (and, in fact, every year), ask each person to express what they are grateful for. Remembering what we do have—the love of family, a full belly, a warm home and the promise of a vaccine in the new year—is a great way to put things in perspective.

While your usual traditions may need to be on hold for the time being, it’s a great time to create some new ones! Some possibilities:

  • Try a new game or enjoy a standard like charades.
  • Get crafty and create some homemade decorations, holiday cards or “thank you” signs to front-line workers that you can display in your front yard.
  • Bake something yummy for your neighbors, especially those who aren’t with their families this year.
  • Take advantage of our beautiful Long Island parks and take a family hike.
  • Ask your kids what they’d like to do that would make the holidays more special.

To read about safety tips for your Thanksgiving from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, click here.

Corporate Giving Still Vital in the Time of COVID, Long Island Business News, November 20, 2020

Corporate Giving Still Vital in the Time of COVID, Long Island Business News, November 20, 2020

Corporate giving is making life a little easier for some of the Long Islanders struggling to make ends meet in the time of COVID-19.

And amid the pandemic, whose earlier shutdown triggered economic fallout across the region and around the country, the need is great.

Just ask Randi Shubin Dresner, the president and CEO of Island Harvest Food Bank, which helps feed the food insecure on Long Island.

“Normally we help 300,000 families a year, but from the end of March to June, we helped 300,000 families,” she said.

This year, Island Harvest increased its food purchases by 500 percent, she said.

Thankfully, some corporate donors and individuals are stepping up.

Take the Mineola-based law firm Meltzer, Lippe, Goldstein and Breitstone.  The firm was gearing up pre-COVID to celebrate its 50th anniversary and wanted to meaningfully mark the occasion.

“Our plans, like so many others, were derailed by the pandemic,” said David Heymann, the firm’s managing partner.

“Accepting the fact that our big day could not happen in 2020, we determined to find some meaningful action we could take to ‘do good’ in recognition of 50 years of legal service and advice to the community,” he said. “We came to the conclusion that with all the stress and suffering, a virtual bash was not appropriate, and our funds could be put to better use, benefitting our less fortunate neighbors. We are extremely proud to have partnered with Island Harvest and the good works that they do.”

The firm’s initiative comes at a time when donors have stepped up their philanthropic giving amid the pandemic. Twenty-five percent of the philanthropic individuals surveyed in a 2020 poll expected to increase their donations, while 54 percent said they would maintain their giving levels, according to Fidelity Charitable, an independent public charity that helps donors support nonprofit organizations. But nearly half of those surveyed expected they would decrease or stop volunteering because of the pandemic. Conducted by the independent research firm Artemis Strategy Group, the survey heard from 1,842 adults earlier this year in the United States.

Dresner said that when Lew Meltzer, the Meltzer, Lippe chairman, toured the Island Harvest facility, he hoped his donation would challenge other law firms to donate as well.

Meanwhile, North Shore Child and Family Guidance Center in Roslyn Heights is also benefitting from generous philanthropy. Its board member Andrew Marcell, the CEO at Aon Reinsurance Solutions, spearheaded a private, socially distanced golf event, and his company raised over $56,000 for the nonprofit.

“This money provides crucial funding for our mental health services for kids and families throughout Nassau County, especially important during the pandemic, when the need is so great,” Andrew Malekoff, North Shore Child and Family Guidance Center’s executive director and CEO, said.

And Family & Children’s Association, one of the largest and oldest health and human service agencies on Long Island, is a beneficiary of Hassett Subaru’s Share the Love Campaign, giving the organization a boost in delivering services.

Still, COVID-19 has cut into the organization’s ability to fundraise.

“I know that there are Long Island charities that are getting a record number of donations, but here at FCA, we haven’t had exactly the same experience,” said Jeffrey Reynolds, FCA’s chief executive.

“Our loyal donors have been supportive, but without events, with everyone complaining about email overload and our staff heavily focused on serving people in need – especially in our programs for homeless teens and services for people with mental health issues – we will likely end the year having to make some program cuts,” Reynolds said.

But that won’t diminish the need for services.

“Government contracts are being cut by 20 percent,” Reynolds said. “We are spending lots of money on PPE and cleaning supplies and our clients are asking for more and more help. That’s a perfect storm and we are making sure to re-double our holiday appeal efforts so that we can maintain programs, avoid waiting lists for services and keep staff in place for the new year. It’s daunting for sure, but I have a lot of confidence that Long Islanders will come through as they always do.”

Already at Island Harvest, organizations are stepping up in time for the holidays.

Bethpage Federal Credit Union, for instance, is launching its contactless Turkey Drive on Nov. 20 at its headquarters so that Long Islanders facing food insecurity can enjoy Thanksgiving.

“When COVID first hit earlier in the year, Bethpage Federal Credit Union immediately dedicated a significant amount of its financial resources to support COVID-specific relief efforts in addition to our normal community giving plans,” said Linda Armyn, Bethpage Federal’s senior vice president of corporate affairs.

The credit union provided “a substantial amount of funding to support healthcare workers, emergency daycare programs, COVID research, hunger relief and seniors, as well as families who became financially stressed through loss of income,” she said.

Wells Fargo funded meals for 1,500 families over six weeks in Hempstead, Dresner said.

Stop and Shop, too, has been “an incredible resource” year-round for Island Harvest. About 10 years ago, Island Harvest brought an idea to cut down waste by donating instead of throwing away meats that neared its sell-by date. The meat is now frozen and distributed to agencies and partners that safely handle frozen food.

Dresner is also active in the Long Island Food Council, where a member company, La Flor, donates spice packets during the holidays. “If you’re struggling to put food out for the family, the last thing you’re going to buy is spice,” Dresner said.

The $50,000 donation from Melter Lippe will provide nutritional education material for thousands of turkeys, so when people bring the poultry home, they understand how to cook it properly according to food safety guidelines.

The money will also go towards marketing efforts to let “others know about the important work we are doing through food donations and monetary support,” Dresner said.

Their generosity may well prompt others to help more Long Islanders persevere through the pandemic.

The Fay J. Lindner Foundation Triage and Emergency Services: Rapid Response When It’s Needed Most

The Fay J. Lindner Foundation Triage and Emergency Services: Rapid Response When It’s Needed Most

When a child breaks a leg or has acute stomach pain, you know where to go: the emergency room at your local hospital.

But if your child is severely depressed or anxious and is talking about self-harm or suicide, where can you turn? 

For the most part, trying to get a quick appointment with a therapist or psychiatrist is nearly impossible.

“We have heard many stories of desperate parents seeking help for their child who is experiencing a mental health crisis, and they’re told that the wait is more than two or three months away,” says Andrew Malekoff, Executive Director at North Shore Child & Family Guidance Center. “That is simply unacceptable.”

To handle such urgent situations, the Guidance Center created the Fay J. Lindner Foundation Triage and Emergency Services, a program that promises to see these cases within 24 to 48 hours.

“From the moment we receive the call for help,” says Malekoff, “our goal is to stabilize, strengthen and support these children and families during this challenging time.”

The program, made possible by a generous grant from the Fay J. Lindner Foundation,  offers rapid response to psychiatric emergencies— a sudden set of circumstances in which there is an impending risk of danger to the child or adolescent such as a risk of suicide or of physical harm to others. It also addresses situations that involve a state of seriously impaired judgment in which the child is endangered, and situations of risk to a defenseless victim involving abuse, neglect or exposure to domestic violence.

Through the program, our expert team of therapists helps the child or adolescent stabilize their mood, learn healthy coping skills and decrease the need for emergency room visits or in-patient hospitalizations.

“If parents can avoid bringing their child to the emergency room during a mental health crisis, that can prevent the child’s exposure to another potentially traumatic situation in the emergency room itself,” explains Malekoff. “Avoiding hospitalization during the pandemic is especially important.”

There has been a dramatic increase in psychiatric emergencies referred to the Guidance Center over the past several years due to a variety factors, including the difficulty in accessing inpatient hospitalization; the decline in availability of inpatient and day treatment beds for children and adolescents; the closing of many mental health clinics in Nassau County; and the escalation of prescription pill and heroin addiction among teenagers and young adults on Long Island.

“The Covid-19 crisis has also impacted our young people, with extremely heightened anxiety and depression levels,” says Malekoff. “Sadly, many have lost parents and other loved ones.”

The Guidance Center is very grateful to the Fay J. Lindner Foundation for its ongoing funding of this lifesaving program. As Lauren McGowan, the Guidance Center’s Director of Development, says, “The Foundation has been one of our most devoted supporters, and we look forward to creating new partnerships as the need for our services continues to grow.”To learn about other naming opportunities, contact McGowan at (516) 626-1971, ext. 320. For more information about our Fay J. Lindner Foundation Triage and Emergency Services and our other programs, please call us at (516) 626-1971. 

Helping Military Families

Helping Military Families

Tomorrow is Veteran’s Day, when we honor all the brave men and women who have served our country. In addition, all of November is Military Family Appreciation Month, when families are recognized for their commitment and contributions in support of our military and nation.

Our country is facing one of the most challenging times in our history, with social unrest, economic hardship and a deadly pandemic. Kids and adults alike are fearful that their loved ones may contract COVID-19. Many have grandparents in nursing homes and assisted living facilities whom they are unable to see. And we are about to embark on a holiday season where our traditional family gatherings likely need to be put aside.

Sadly, some children are dealing with the grief of having lost parents, grandparents or other beloved family members.

For military families, these worries and losses are compounded by unique challenges. Children in these families often must deal with lengthy separations from their parents—difficult on their own, but add to that the fear that a loved one may not come home, and it’s clear why these kids are under enormous stress and experiencing heightened anxiety and depression.

Plus, military families relocate 10 times more often than civilian families—on average, every two or three years, so children face separation not only from their parents, but from their friends.

Not surprising, studies show that one third of school-age military children show behaviors such as being anxious, worrying often and crying more frequently.

Luckily, there is something parents can do to care for their kids—and themselves—when facing a deployment. Here’s some advice from KidsHealth:

  • Be honest. The words you use are important and can mean different things depending on a child’s age and maturity, so give kids the truth in terms they can understand. 
  • Let kids know that they will be taken care of. Kids need to feel protected in a parent’s absence, so tell them who will be taking care of them during the time away. 
  • Make a plan to stay connected. Let kids know that goodbyes are hard for everyone — even grown-ups. Remind them that they’ll be thought of and loved while the parent is away and talk about the people who will be there to help them feel better when they’re feeling sad.
  • Spend extra time together. In the days and weeks before departure, many military parents feel pressure to get the house in order by tackling their overloaded to-do lists. Though fixing leaky faucets and taking the car for a tune-up are important, so is plenty of one-on-one time with each child. 
  • Keep a routine. Help offset feelings of uncertainty by keeping life at home as predictable as possible. In the face of big changes, even small things that stay the same — like a simple bedtime routine or a fun Saturday morning ritual — can be extremely reassuring.
  • Keep the absent parent a part of children’s lives. Whether it’s counting down days on a calendar, making a scrapbook or organizing an activity your loved one would like, encourage your kids to find creative ways to stay connected to the parent who’s away.
  • Talk often and listen well.  Talk to them about the things that upset them and let them know it’s OK to feel worried sometimes and that you feel that way too. 
  • Get support. A parent’s departure is not only unsettling for the kids, but also overwhelming for the partner who must absorb all the extra duties. The armed forces have many programs to help families get through the tough times. Visit www.usa.gov/military-assistance for information.

Remember, North Shore Child & Family Guidance Center is here for your family! Call us at (516) 626-1971 for help.

Reducing Stress During the Pandemic

Reducing Stress During the Pandemic

Tomorrow is International Stress Awareness Day, and if ever the world needed some stress reduction, it’s now.

The pandemic is an ongoing global concern, especially with winter just around the corner.  With the U.S. nearing eight months of virus-related closures, all of us are understandably experiencing heightened levels of anxiety and depression.

In addition, the holidays are just around the corner, and this year, the usual holiday stress is magnified by the fear of becoming ill, the loss of treasured family traditions and the isolation that seems to permeate much of our lives. And for many, this holiday will mark the first time they will be without a loved one who passed from the virus.

According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, COVID-19 stress can cause the worsening of mental health conditions, and that’s definitely been born out by our experience at North Shore Child & Family Guidance Center.

“For kids who already experienced anxiety, depression and other mental health challenges, the pandemic has definitely increased their symptoms,” says Regina Barros-Rivera, Associate Executive Director of the Guidance Center. “They’re worried about the health of their parents and loved ones, and many families are struggling financially because of job losses. Remote schooling can be stressful, too.”

The pandemic can also result in changes in sleep and eating patterns; trouble concentrating; and increased use of alcohol and drugs.

Now is as good a time as any to learn some techniques to help both you and your family manage the many stressors in your life. Although the following are good steps to take all year long, they’re especially important now, and apply to kids and adults alike.

  • Eat healthy foods
  • Avoid drugs and alcohol
  • Exercise regularly
  • Get outside in the fresh air as much as possible
  • Establish a routine for getting 8 hours of sleep each night (or more for children and teens)
  • Connect with family and friends, even if you can’t see them in person
  • Schedule time to have fun and engage in activities you enjoy
  • Limit your exposure to news
  • Develop a practice of meditation and deep breathing (see “Breathe Deep”)

Also, know that help is available. At the Guidance Center, we are providing remote telehealth services or, when needed, in-person therapy. Call us at (516) 626-1971, or email intake@northshorechildguidance.org.

Breathe Deep
It’s more important than ever to learn stress reduction techniques such as meditation and deep breathing.
In our Guidance Center Perspectives on Pandemic 2020, we’ve interviewed many experts, and two are specialists in
stress-reduction techniques.
You can view the videos here:
Mindfulness with Dr. Ariel Botta, Part 1; Mindfulness with Dr. Ariel Botta, Part 2; and Breathing and Breath-work for the Pandemic and Other Toxic Stress.

Helpful Resources from Our Experts:

Dealing with the Stress of the Corona Outbreak and Quarantine

The Guidance Center’s COVID-19 Response

Wellness Tips for the Caregiver

Helping Your Children Manage Stress

Soothing Your Anxious Child

Sources:

https://www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-ncov/daily-life-coping/managing-stress-anxiety.htmlhttps://emergency.cdc.gov/coping/selfcare.asp